Now Playing Tracks

klainechel:

::: a playlist for when you need some sexy mmmm mm :::

*listen * download*

teenage love affair - alicia keys | last request - paolo nutini | 1+1 - beyonce | when i get you alone - thicke | saving all my love for you - whitney houston | like a virgin - vince kidd | let’s get it on - marvin gaye | shiver shiver - walk the moon | i want you (hold on to love) - cee lo green | my baby just cares for me - nina simone | golden lady - stevie wonder | adorn - miguel | elusive - lianne la havas | l-o-v-e - joss stone | butterfly - jason mraz | sweet life - frank ocean | let’s do it (let’s fall in love) - ella fitzgerald | don’t you - darren criss | love sex magic - ciara ft. justin timberlake | kiss me - ed sheeran 

How To Make Love

halffizzbin:

cricketandperv:

violetsunnyklaus:

About seven years ago, all my friends my age got married. And about three years after that, they all started having babies, which set into motion the idea that eventually they’re gonna have to talk about sex to their kids. And that just freaks me out. I have cats—they were broken, but now they’re fixed—so I don’t have to worry about this. However, if I had the opportunity to suddenly be confronted by my son as a young man asking me for advice about sex… with girls… this is what I would say.

One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay. (Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own. (Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.

Love, Dad.

This guy’s writing is fantastic. And also OMG STAR WARS.

Holy shit this is literally all you need to know.

(Source: internmarlee)

flirtyduetsshop:

It’s the Flirty Duets January Giveawaaaay!

You could win a $15 gift card to the flirtyduets.com shop!

Rules:

-Reblogs and Likes Count (Up to 10 reblogs please)

-I will ship anywhere in the world

-Don’t have to be following any of the blogs

-I will choose a winner on the last day of January using a generator to randomize the notes.

-Make sure your askbox is open so I can notify you if you win!

-Once notified the winner will be emailed a gift certificate to use specifically at flirtyduets.com. Almost everything in the store is $15 or under so you can use it on almost anything!

adropofred:

drblaine:

daphodilly:

{BITESby foxxed
(complete)

Pairing: Kurt/Blaine
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Overload cooking; Switch!Klaine; Blowjobs; Frotting; Handjobs; M/M Sex
Wordcount: ~36.000
Disclaimer: Glee, Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson, and all other recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, Brad Falchuk, and Fox. Used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended. Restaurant names are mine.

Summary: Kurt Hummel is a Chef de Cuisine with a tongue as sharp as his knife. But when the restaurant across the street finally opens, Kurt is confronted with an old culinary school rival – the always smiling and opera-singing Italian Chef Blaine Anderson and things are about to heat up faster than the average stove.

A/N: This is what happens when you watch too much FoodNetwork, eternal thanks to my betas lurkdusoleil and katasticthunder

{Le Menu}

LiveJournal | FanFiction.net | Scarves & Coffee

DELIGHTFUL. DELICIOUS.

Read it.

YES THIS WAS THE BEST

(Source: vosje)

substantialityou:

oncetwiceforever:

staceysthings:

stut—ter:

rainystory:

One more night AU Trailer | Klaine

Storyline
Blaine had it all. He was popular and dating the hottest girl in the school.
However, not everything was as it seemed.
Meanwhile, Kurt was the only openly gay in school. He was hopelessly in love with Blaine, but He knew he had no chance with him. But one night they run into each other in gay bar and it turned out that Blaine was gay as well and their feelings for each other were mutual. After that they started seeing each other but Blaine wanted to keep their romance a secret because he was afraid to come out and he didn’t want to lose his reputation…

Okay…first of all?  This is amazing.  SUCH a good trailer.  Secondly: if this fic already exists can I has it?  Thirdly: if not, someone write it!  

WOW. This is GREAT.

this is seriously everything. i haven’t seen a trailer this well made maybe ever.

Now this. THIS. This is amazing. And yes, I’ve read a couple of fic that were written along the line of this trailer, butthe one I’m thinking of is horrible and dripping with deep sitting homophobia. I will not recommend it. This trailer is great, though.

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